Remember

If my definition of affection as simply the emotion we feel when we see value, beauty or meaning in someone or something, is correct, then we lose affection by simply no longer seeing value, beauty or meaning in the object of our affection. I have found the very simple act of looking at the person I have lost affection for and re-experienceing what it was that inspired my affection in the past rekindles some of that feeling. This isn’t a thinking thing it's a perceiving thing. You just watch the person you have had affection for in the past and allow yourself to see what it is that you saw before.

We tend to not have as much affection after being with someone for a long time simply because we are not paying as much attention to them as we did initially. The same things that we loved about them are probably still there. We just need to pay attention.

If you think they have lost what it was that inspired you before, you are probably wrong. I will talk more about this later, but even if your affection was inspired by physical beauty and that beauty has faded your original affection was probably not for the form alone. The form of a human being is of value only because of the person inside. You aren’t attracted to the body by itself. The body has meaning and beauty because of who is in it or who you imagine is in it. When someone dies they no longer have the attraction that existed when they inhabited the body, only to the extent one imagines the person still being in the body.